I'M LOST

I had a great weekend, and yet I feel like I accomplished nothing. I went to the club to celebrate one of my good friends birthday and basically hang out with folks I hadn't seen in a while. After all that I still feel like I'm still back to square one. Like I lost some time hanging out and relaxing. I feel almost guilty about it. I think it's weird how one measure progress. What is progress? What sense of progress are you talking about. Is it the type of progress where you have tons of paperwork to go through and you've just completed the last piece of paper in the stack. That's one form.

Taking off a load off for the weekend to look after you're health and well being. Not thinking or having anything on your mind, is that another form of progress? It doesn't feel like it. It actually feels like wasted time.

I guess you can say that I have come to a crossroad and I don't know which way to go. It seems like I always make the wrong decision whenever possible. It's just a gift that I have acquired that I am desperately trying to return.

I guess I feel this way because I will be 23 years old and I feel like I have accomplished nothing. No career, 5 months away from graduation, no long term relationships, nothing. Many say that going to college is an accomplishment. Working two jobs is an accomplishment. Those are all givens to me. There suppose to happen. It would not be me if I did not have those things.

I don't know. I'm tired of going in circles. I'm ready for change. I just hope that the world is ready for my change!!!

Sophia